New Glasses... New Vision?

I’ve had a lovely pair of burgundy-ish, pink-ish, brown-ish Emporio Armani glasses for approximately two and a half years now. I love them and it hurts a little to part with them. I remember it took a long time for me to find that one pair that suited me well. Although I was a bit hesitant in choosing them, I quickly warmed up to having a… a bolder look, a look I was not accustomed to. A lot of people liked my glasses and that made me like them even more. A lot of people probably didn’t either, but that never changed a thing. They were comfortable, they looked nice, they were not common and, most importantly, they helped me to see better.

I got new glasses recently. This pair is quite different from the one I had before, one main difference being the colour. This is black. Black Dolce & Gabbana glasses. Also, they are a little more conservative and perhaps a bit more professional-looking than the ones I had prior. I like them even though, in all honesty, they never spoke to me quite like the other pair did. This one was more of a whisper. But still, I like them and I know I will definitely grow to love them.

Sometimes I wish my life could be changed as easily as I can change my glasses but… how does that saying go again?… If wishes were horses beggars would ride. Whatever that means, I guess what I want to say is that one can always wish but wishes don’t always come through. I could wish for change until the cows come home but it really isn’t as simple… Not even as simple as getting new glasses. Here’s why…

One cannot just try on a life. I must have tried on every pair of glasses at the optician’s because I know I’m gonna be stuck with whatever pair I choose for approximately two years. With that in mind, I must at least be stuck with something I can tolerate and am comfortable in. While it was so easy for me to just try a pair of glasses and decide immediately they didn’t fit or suit me well, it’s not quite as easy as it relates to life. Yes, I may choose to do something new on a whim or as often as I like but more often than not I am not able to see the immediate consequences/results of that choice. As a result, I must consider that I may be stuck with a bad choice for quite some time and actually think things through before I make a decision. This is how I know I will never get a tattoo because it is not something I can just try on. Give me a pen and a boring meeting and I am sure I will end up with some cute “tattoo” on my hand (or anywhere else I can draw in public without it seeming inappropriate or weird) before that meeting is through. But getting a real tattoo? No. Way. I know myself quite a bit and I know for sure that this minute I’d be in love with it but the next minute I’d want it off me immediately! (I’ll get a mehndi instead )

So, I got new glasses. Why not a new life just as easily? Because change is not always easy or feasible. I could choose any pair of glasses I wanted so long as I could afford them. The choice was in my hands (or eyes). It was solely up to me. All power was mine. In real life, it’s not as simple. You are the masters of your destiny, they tell you. You have the power to change your life, they say. But how many of us really have the power to do what we want to do? How many of us can just make any change we want in our lives? If I were to ask you what you would be doing with your life now if money were no object, how many of you could willingly and honestly say they would want to live life the exact way they are living it now? Isn’t there someone who’d really like a [better] job? Or maybe just a vacation to somewhere… exotic? Or their own business? What about that “dream deferred”? Yes, the one you’ve had for as long as you could remember but find yourself moving further and further away from… That same dream locked in a box on the shelf of your mind, almost forgotten, gathering dust and cobwebs… I know I can change my life. Don’t get me wrong. My point is that sometimes, just sometimes, the power to make the change I want is not always solely in my hands.

A change in my life is not always easy because my choices affects others. I am well of age and I am able to make my own choices in life but, whereas the decision for a pair of glasses more or less affects nothing of consequence, important decisions I make affect others. This is especially so because I have people who I love and care for. Whether I like to admit it or not (and for the record, I don’t), these people are major players in my decision-making process. I’m sure I’m not the only one who has made a particular choice (consciously or unconsciously) based on its effect on the people we love.

With all of those differences though, there is at least one similarity. There is at least one way in which one’s life can be changed as easily as getting new glasses. As anyone who wears prescription glasses knows, after every two years or so it’s time to re-visit the optician and most likely get new lenses. After two years, your vision may have changed and so it’s time for a check-up to ensure things are in order and most likely get new lenses. Likewise, there are some people in our lives that we just have to get rid of after a while. People who make no positive contributions to our lives, who mean us more harm than good… People who make us worse instead of better… All of us should have that instance where we decide to assess ourselves, clear our visions and get rid of the naysayers, the ones who squash our dreams even before we express them. Because, as much as it is not easy to make a change in life as easily as one can change glasses, it is next to impossible to make a change while having someone drag you down. It’s like trying to swim with an anchor tied around your neck. In this case, it is time for a change and don’t worry, “the bridges you burn will light the way”. Hopefully.

~Wellie

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